CITY SLYME ! (Article 2)

By Pitor Manfried

Hello, my dear readers! I know it has been a long time since I have graced your eyes with my divine literation, however, I will have you know your wait has not been wasted. I have travelled the world, seen incredible sights, spoken to many foreigners, ate strange foods, and even drank the water without serious intestinal sickness. I, for no better description, made Bear Grylls look like a pansy.

Enough about all that though. Lets get to our topic of the article.

Have you ever had those days when you just want to take a fukitol and not be awake for awhile? I have had an entire year at work that makes me want to take one of those pills. Unfortunately, it would not do well for the boss to be in that kind of mood. So, I have to soldier on and be a good drone for the company and try to keep my minions productive and happy. You see, I am the filter for these minions. I have to filter out all the upper supervision bull feces so the minions do their bidding and keep the troglodytes happy. Nothing like being middle management. Unfortunately for you, my dear readers, I cannot reveal any further details about what I do for real, since you do not have either the clearance or need to know. Sorry.

Elsewhere, it seems to be that my neighbor has decided to once again grow organic fukitol in his back yard this year. Now I really do not care much for the medical usage argument or the right to pollute ones body argument. You can keep all that to yourself. My opinion is what matters in this situation, as I am the one directly affected by that stinky plant. Unlike all you pot-heads out there, I am allergic to this plant. I get hives and my eyes water so much that I cannot see. My dog loses her hair because of it, too, so the argument that it is a beneficial plant does not fly with me.

It also seems that the laws in this county that I live do not apply to these pieces of refuse that live behind me. All plants that are grown for personal medicinal use must be grown indoors in either a garage or green house. These plants are outside. These people are some of society’s best examples of burnouts. Their rented house is crap. They do not take care of anything. No one who is a 420 proponent would even try to clean these people up to use as an example of “how good this plant is for you”. I know that I am usually very politically correct and kind, but I seriously hope an airplane crashes into their house while they sleep.

So once again, I have to spend another summer fighting allergies that I shouldn’t have to because of these horrible miscreants. These are incidentally the same folks who had a Bull Mastiff that broke the fence and bit me in the arm in my own yard. Don’t worry, though; karma caught up with the poor pooch. It met its demise. Not by the business end of my Remington 870, but by a fast moving truck. When the owner told me this, I told him that it deserved what it got. Pitor is not empathetic towards violent animals.

Once again, these are my ramblings. In summary: dope is bad, people who smoke it tend to be useless, and their animals are stupid.

Have a good day, and I hope that all your plants wither and die. This is Pitor Manfried leaving you with this final thought: your opinion doesn’t matter at all to me, but please feel free to leave a post!

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